Life Still Sucks When You're Dead
by Shadelyn
Summary: Sequel to "Life Sucks When You're Dead". This is the continuing story of the death and rebirth of Aryn Carter. Vampire. Unfortunately for her, getting herself killed is the least of her problems. part 2 of 3
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

Awkward. That's the best way I can think to describe finding yourself in a small bedroom with both your ex boyfriend and your current boyfriend. Maybe boyfriend. We hadn't really defined anything yet.

The two men ignored each other while we packed my things. Nicky ignored Ben in a way that was so casual you couldn't really accuse him of being rude. He made it look natural. Ben, however, made ignoring Nicky look like hard work. He was hostile without saying a word. He didn't even look in Nicky's direction. But the air around him... it was thick. It made my skin crawl.

Ben finished stuffing a drawer full of my socks and other more intimate articles of clothing into a garbage bag, then stomped out of the bedroom with bag in hand. Why garbage bags? Hell, they're cheap, reusable later on to put actual garbage in, and disposable. You don't have to break them down like cardboard boxes when you want to get rid of them.

Nicky and I glanced at each other when Ben left the room, each of our mouths quirking upwards into identical smiles at the release of tension in the room. I had to break eye contact before he did. That man could light me up like a Christmas tree, and this was neither the appropriate time or place.

"Eryn," Ben called from the other room.

I groaned. The man was helpless. If he had to ask me who was getting what again, I was going to break whatever "it" was over his head. I didn't want much more than my clothes. As far as I was concerned, he could have everything else in the apartment. Or throw everything out. I didn't care.

Nicky scooped an armload of clothes from the closet, all still attached to their hangers, then dumped them unceremoniously into a bag on the floor. I winced, but didn't say anything. The wrinkles could be ironed out later. Ask a guy to help you pack your clothes up and you got what you deserved.

I left Nicky to it and went to find Ben. He was in the living room, tying up the bag he'd carried out. I couldn't help but wonder if he'd chosen that particular drawer to pack just to prevent Nicky from doing so. God forbid another man touch my obnoxious Christmas socks with the purple and orange snowflakes... or my panties. Ben had gotten seriously territorial since I'd broken things off with him and now he'd made sure his scent was all over my bras and such. It was not only immature, but it was pointless. Nicky was human, so he wouldn't smell Ben on me. I would, but I didn't care enough for it to affect me. I stopped behind the couch, using it to keep a safe distance between the two of us.

"That guy," Ben said while putting a great deal of effort into tying a simple knot in the drawstrings of the garbage bag, "You seeing him now?"

"Sort of," I said, and even I could hear the suspicion in the tone of my voice.

Ben and I had called things quits three weeks earlier and I'd moved out. Or at least I'd ended things, and I'd left. I was only just now getting around to actually moving out. I hadn't wanted to return and had put off doing so for as long as I could. I couldn't afford to keep buying new clothes just because I was too chickenshit to face Ben and pack my stuff up. I was out of work and my savings was quickly diminishing, not to mention what I was going to do to my credit if I couldn't pay off my growing debt. At least living in the master vampire's house, which wasn't entirely voluntary, meant I didn't have to pay rent. Anyway, Nicky had insisted I take someone with me to empty the apartment. He didn't trust Ben. I didn't either, really. So I'd dragged Nicky along, taking his insistence as volunteering.

"I don't like it," Ben said, looking up at me.

I snorted. "You don't have to like it."

"He's too old for you."

I rolled my eyes. "Ten years. But one of us is dead, so... kind of trumps the age thing."

"Are you sleeping with him?"

Okay, that was inappropriate. I narrowed my gaze. "How is that your business?"

The fact was, Nicky and I had not slept together yet. Oh, we'd come close. More than once. The attraction we felt, the pull, was hard to deny. But I hadn't wanted to be the girl who jumps into bed with a guy immediately after jumping out of one with someone else. I'd first kissed Nicky only hours after ending it with Ben. And, well, I'd been busy over the past few weeks. You could say we were seeing each other now, but barely. It was the rare night I got any free time to spend with him. Being newly dead and all, my nights were monopolized learning how to be a proper blood sucking fiend. Mostly that involved getting kicked around by a 5'2" teenaged girl who barely weighed 90 pounds, while my vampire mentor watched. Sometimes he took a turn kicking my ass too, which was preferable to the teenaged girl. Yeah, she was that scary. But I wasn't going to encourage Ben by telling him I wasn't screwing someone else.

"You are my business." He said, voice dropping to a whisper. But it was whispered fiercely…possessively.

I was going to have to get a new bag. Ben was doing a number on the one he was slowly shredding.

"Not anymore, I'm not." I told him.

He gritted his teeth.

When I'd been attacked and turned into a vampire, Ben hadn't handled it well. At all. He'd barely been able to look at me, and he'd made vague threats about killing me. One of his friends had done worse. That friend was dead now, and not the vampire kind of dead either. He was just dead.

Ben stepped torturing the plastic bag and stepped around the couch. I should have walked away right then, gone back into the bedroom, and finished helping Nicky pack my things. But I held my ground. Maybe part of me was looking for a fight. Ben didn't stop until he stood very close to me. Close enough that I could feel the heat of his body. It was a heat my own body no longer produced. Not unless I expended a lot of energy to warm it. Or unless I fed.

I turned my back to him, as much to see down the hallway and into the bedroom as to turn away from Ben. I couldn't see Nicky, which meant he couldn't see us. When Ben put an arm around me, fingers splayed across my stomach, and buried his nose in my hair at the back of my neck, I was grateful for that. Awkward wasn't strong enough a word to describe it.

"Don't," I growled in warning.

He brushed my hair aside and pressed his lips against my neck. When I made to squirm away, his arm tightened around me.

"I miss you," he said, very quietly. "I want you to come home. You belong here, with me."

My body flashed warm for the quickest fraction of a second before I felt like I'd been plunged into ice water. With inhuman speed, I jerked my elbow back into his gut and the air whooshed out of his lungs. His arm tightened around me again before it loosened, but when it did I didn't hesitate to push him away. I hadn't hurt him though. Not really.

"Eryn," he grunted.

"No." I glared at him.

"I love you."

"Yeah," I said coldly. "A little too late for you to figure that out."

I retreated back down the hall and he didn't follow.

Nicky was leaning against the wall, arms crossed, but more in a comfortably casual way than anything else.

"Ready to get out of here?" He asked me.

"God, yes." I picked up two of the overstuffed garbage bags from the floor. "How much of that did you hear?"

"Some," he said. He sounded unconcerned; not the slightest bit jealous. That was good though. I'd had enough of possessive, insecure, jealous men. A little bit was flattering. A little bit more was suffocating.

Between the two of us, we managed to carry everything in only two trips to Nicky's borrowed Crown Victoria. His other means of transportation was a Buell motorcycle, which would have made moving a little tricky. My own car wouldn't have been much better.

Ben came out of the apartment to watch us as we headed downstairs with our last load. When I glanced up at him, I saw he was actually watching Nicky, not me. I didn't like the look on his face. It was calculating, like he was taking the measure of the man who'd taken what was his, and he was weighing his odds of getting it back. He looked like he thought the odds were clearly in his favor. If that was the case, he was wrong. Ben was a werewolf, and he could take Nicky in a fight if it came to physical blows. But he wouldn't win me back.

We got the last of my bags in the trunk and I took Nicky's hand in mine as he walked me to the passenger side to open the door for me. It was such a gentlemanly thing to do, and to look at Nicky, you wouldn't expect it. He was working the bad boy, street tough image with worn, baggy clothes and a jacket even though it was hotter than Hades outside. Of course, the jacket concealed the shoulder holster he wore, and the .45 caliber handgun he always carried with him. He wore his blonde hair a little longer than I usually liked on a guy, though he was clean shaven. All in all, he didn't look like a guy you'd want to run into in the dark, and if you did, you probably checked to make sure you still had your wallet afterward. He was a good guy though, and the look was just camouflage.

I stole a kiss while he held the door open, and then lingered because one little kiss was like getting a small taste of chocolate when you were craving the whole bar. He left me hungry for more though, because after one more quick kiss he swatted me on the ass to get me moving. I could see Ben in the rear view mirror. He didn't look happy. I, on the other hand, grinned like mad and couldn't wipe the smile off my face.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Nicky pulled the car into the circular drive in front of the house. It was a pretty impressive building, just shy of being worthy of the name mansion. It was all white columned elegance hidden behind a wrought iron gate, and guarded by a security detail of loyal humans. Quite a few of them at that, though few ever stayed in plain sight.

A few weeks earlier there had been an attack on the house and the human guards on duty had been slaughtered, so there were quite a few new faces to be seen among the guard. One such guard stood beside the front doors of the house. When Nicky popped the trunk, he came over to help us unload.

"I need to talk to the boss," Nicky hefted two bags from the trunk. "I'll find you upstairs in a few minutes."

"Kay," I knocked one of my bags into him and he nudged me with his hip, nearly knocking me off balance. Yeah, graceful.

"I win," he smirked.

I considered saying something colorful and not very ladylike, but then Nathan met us at the door and my mood took a trip somewhere dark and unpleasant. He was nice to look at. Really nice to look at actually, with dark hair that curled around his ears, dark eyes, and one of those mouths most women would probably love kissing... if he weren't such an ass.

"I don't remember giving you the night off," he said lightly, but I knew better by now than to take his tone of voice at face value. He usually came off as friendly and easy going. But it was an act.

"I told you I needed to clean out my apartment. You and Aris can kick my ass later." I tried to go around him to get in the door, but he stepped in front of me and blocked the way.

"Yes, I remember. But I didn't agree to let you off, did I? Besides, it looks like a bunch of rubbish to me." He poked at one of the bags I held. "These should go in the dumpster, not the house."

"It's not trash." I sighed, feeling tired. Nathan always made me feel tired. Or angry, frustrated, sick... homicidal. "They're my clothes and stuff."

"C'mon Nate, give her a break," Nicky stepped up behind me. "You've been working her nonstop for weeks. Give her a night."

Nathan kept his eyes on me. He didn't think much of me. I was a newbie vampire, and that didn't make me much better than a human in his eyes, but he still considered me more worthwhile than Nicky. Nicky was human after all. To Nathan, that meant he wasn't worth his time at all. Unless he needed something from him. But then, Nicky also worked for the vamps off and on, so he couldn't afford to completely disregard him either.

A muscle twitched in Nathan's cheek, and he finally pulled his eyes away from me and regarded Nicky. "It's Nathan. Not Nate, not Nathaniel, not dude, man, or whatever else you think might be an appropriate way to address me. It's Nathan. If that's too difficult for you, you may address me as Mr. Grant. I'll even answer to Grant, but my name... is not... Nate."

"Whatever you say, Nate." Nicky said, looking more amused by the exchange than I thought was healthy, but Nathan just turned back to me, dismissing Nicky.

"I'll be generous and let you keep one bag. The rest go in the dumpster and get burned." He smiled as he watched my face darken in anger. "Next time maybe you'll consider your duties before you run off without permission. I expect you in the ballroom in twenty minutes."

I stood frozen, fists clenched around the handles of my two bags, fingernails digging into the palms of my hands. I didn't so much as blink until he turned away and walked back into the house, closing the door behind him. Then I dropped the bags and spun around to face Nicky.

"I swear to God, one of these days I'm going to stake that..." Nicky pressed his hand over my mouth and hushed me.

"You know he's still listening, right? He's trying to piss you off so you'll go in there fighting mad and too worked up to focus on your training. Then he has an excuse to keep working you. Let it go. Take a bag up; I'll put the rest back in the car. He's not going to burn your stuff. Alright?" Nicky stood close, and while I was still highly agitated, his proximity calmed me enough to keep me from outright exploding.

I nodded, unshed tears stinging my eyes. I blinked until they no longer threatened to fall.

"I have to talk to Erik real quick, but I'll catch you in your room before you have to meet up with Nathan." He gave me a quick kiss and vanished into the house.

. . . . .

Upstairs, I sunk down onto my bed and dropped the single bag I'd managed to bring onto the floor. I tore it open to see what I'd managed to save, and... laughed. Feeling entirely miserable, I kicked the bag across the room, spilling some of the contents onto the carpet. Underwear, socks, bras, and a small jewelry box. Maybe some pajamas. Of all the bags I could have brought up, I'd had to grab the one that had Ben's scent all over it. Great. I rolled over and pressed my face into a pillow and screamed. It didn't make me feel all that much better. I tried kicking my feet a few times. That was a little better. Distracting at least.

"What did the bed do?" Nicky came in and closed my bedroom door behind him.

"I was having a moment." I rolled over onto my side so I could look up at him. "What's that?"

Nicky held a black case at his side. It looked familiar.

"Uhh... three week anniversary present?" He sat beside me and put the case down on the bed.

I brushed my fingers over the rough plastic. It had the word Glock pressed into the top.

"You stole Ben's gun? Sweet. Can I shoot Nathan with it?" I sat up and Nicky handed me a keyring with two silver keys on it. I unlocked the gun case.

"I did not, and that's probably not a good idea. This one is yours."

I opened the case and smiled, lifted the black handgun out. I checked the chamber, then inserted one of the magazines. They were empty, but I tested the weight in my hands.

"It's bigger than I'm used to." I said.

Nicky grinned. "That's what she said."

I snickered.

"It's a .45 cal Glock 21. So yeah, a bit more kick than you're used to but you got all that vamp strength now, so you can handle it without breaking your wrist or clocking yourself in the face." He brushed my hair back from my face as I put the gun back in its case. "Erik says you can get ammo for it from Aris. Dunno if she has silver or not, but you shouldn't need it."

"This had to have been expensive," I said, locking the case back up and moving it out of the way. "Very sweet though, thank you." I moved closer to him, because... hot boy on my bed. Oh boy.

"Well..." he said, smiling again. "Erik paid for it."

"Oh," I said, then leaned in to brush my lips across his mouth. "So I should be thanking him instead?"

"I did pick it out," he offered.

"In that case," I wrapped my arms around his neck and pushed my body against him. He was so warm, and he made me feel so good, I never wanted to let go of him. I always felt cold, and while I'd gotten used to it, mostly, having a warm body wrapped around me was pure heaven. Especially when that body was Nicky, who had assured me numerous times that he didn't think I felt cold.

He put his hands on my hips and pulled me into his lap, where I happily relaxed against him.

We kissed, but they were sweeter than they were intense. They were the kind of kisses that made me feel like a teenager again, and while that wasn't as long ago for me as it was for Nicky, I think it did the same for him. Usually I liked it, because in it there was something fresh and undiscovered. For a while it could make me forget I'd ever kissed anyone else. But sometimes it just made me feel self conscious. Having to deal with Ben did that to me.

"Are you really okay with this?" I asked around Nicky's mouth.

"Shh, busy here. Kissing." He lifted a hand to the back of my head to lock my mouth against his, which would usually have shut me right up.

I bit his lip. When that didn't get me more than a grunt, I poked him in the ribs. He sighed.

"The vampire thing. Does it bother you?" I asked, and while I was very serious, Nicky wasn't in the mood for meaningful conversation.

He took my hand and lowered it down between our bodies. My eyes widened.

"Does it feel like it bothers me?" He asked.

"Okay, that's crude." I said, but couldn't stop the grin that spread across my face. "But you're a guy. That doesn't mean much."

"It doesn't bother me. If it did, I wouldn't be here." He cupped my face in his hands and looked at me. "So long as you keep the fangs away when you bite me. Biting as foreplay, good. Biting to draw blood, bad."

Worries soothed, for the moment at least, I pulled his hands away from my face and kissed him again. We didn't get far though, because this time it was him that pulled away. He was a little breathless.

"I need to take you out on a proper date again," he said. We'd had a couple of those, though the last time he'd tried to take me to the movies and we hadn't made it out of the car. We'd spent the two hours talking though. Mostly. "Are you training again tomorrow night?"

"Sort of?" I said. "I have plans with Madeline. She's taking me shopping, on her dime. She's taken it upon herself to educate my poor sense of taste. Her words. But at this point, I can't afford to turn down free material goods. And she kind of owes me. She's the one who suggested to Nathan that he employ Aris in teaching me how not to die in a fight. I hate her a little bit for that. But she's my only friend with fangs, so I have to hate her and love her at the same time."

"I can't have you after?" He asked, and the double meaning just about set my body on fire because it put all kinds of wicked thoughts in my head. "I can take you out for cheesecake."

I frowned. "I can't eat. Don't tease."

"Don't pout," he said against my mouth. "A few bites won't hurt you. I can feed them to you slowly, a little bit at a time."

My body heated again. "That sounds... fun."

"Mmm hmm," Nicky kissed me once more before he slid his legs out from under me. "Go learn to kick ass. Call me when you get back tomorrow."

I felt like throwing another tantrum on the bed, but I dragged myself to my feet and walked Nicky out. Then I went to the ballroom to get my ass kicked... again.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

Vampires at the mall. Whatever. I thought it was funny, and I couldn't stop laughing about it. And it was still daylight outside, being early in the evening. The mall had a multilevel parking garage with a sheltered entrance to the building, which had no natural light except at a few entrances leading to outdoor parking. Those areas were easily avoided. It was perfect.

Despite anything I might have said to Nicky, I didn't actually feel that comfortable letting someone else pay my way. So, when Madeline led me straight away to one of the more upscale shops, I perused the sales racks for bargains. She rolled her eyes at me and left me to my own devices, vanishing into the racks to find whatever it was she was looking for.

I soon discovered that this was one of those places that didn't carry anything larger than a size nine. A few weeks earlier I had been a seven, and I doubted that had changed with becoming dead and all, though I had developed quite a bit of muscle since then. I found a few cute tops and a pair of jeans to try on, but just when I opened the door to one of the dressing rooms, Madeline descended upon me. She swept the clothes out of my hands and into the small stall, then shut the door in my face.

"Uhh... you know they're easier to try on if I'm actually in there with the clothes, right?" I raised my eyebrows at her with a small shake of my head.

"Please, if it's on sale that means nobody wanted it. That usually means there's a reason nobody wanted it." She gestured to the armful of garments she carried. "Something in here should work. Let's visit the sales clerk and get out of here before you find the clearance racks and I have to hurt you."

I made a face at her when she crooked her finger at me, but followed her to the register.

"Now pay attention," she said. I knew how to pay for purchases though, thank you, so I just stuck my tongue out at her and she snapped her teeth in my direction.

She dumped her armload onto the counter and smiled at the clerk, a thirty-something woman who looked uncomfortable in her job, like she'd rather have been manning the register at a younger, trendier store. I was right there with her. I wondered if I'd manage to get anything out of this shopping trip that I'd actually want to wear.

The woman scanned the tags on the items while Madeline stood, tapping her long, manicured nails on the counter. I thought it was making the clerk nervous. She watched the woman work, and while there was a slight smile on her face, she looked predatory. I nudged her with my hip, but she just pursed her lips for a moment and otherwise ignored me.

The sales clerk finished and rang up the total, which made me cough, because it was more than I had ever brought home on any single paycheck. Actually, make that a whole month of paychecks, including any of the months where I'd once been working three jobs.

"Are you sure," Madeline asked sweetly. Madeline wasn't the sweet type.

The woman's forehead creased and she stared at Madeline. There was silence as the two stared at each other, and when a few beads of sweat appeared on the woman's brow, Madeline smiled again.

"I'm fairly certain you've overcharged me." Madeline plucked a pair of costume earrings off a display sitting on the counter and dropped them in front of the woman.

The clerk looked down at the earrings and shook herself out of her daze. "Will that be all?" She asked, but didn't wait for an answer. "That'll be twelve dollars and ninety-nine cents."

Madeline handed the woman a twenty and took the bag of clothes, leaving the earrings behind on the counter. "Come along," she called behind her and I hurried after her.

I darted a quick look back at the clerk, who was holding the twenty dollar bill and looking at it as though she wasn't sure where it had come from.

"What was that?" I asked Madeline.

"Your first lesson," she said, then pushed the bag at me. It was either grab it or let it clobber me in the chest. "Shoes next, and we'll see how well you can work your magic."

I made an unhappy sound in my throat that didn't sound half as awful as I felt. This was uncharted territory for me and I was being thrown in head first.

. . . . .

Four boxes of shoes separated me from a very cute shoe salesman. One who had flirted with me a little bit since coming into the store, and with Madeline standing around, I thought that was rather amazing. She was all kinds of redheaded, tall, slender, model-like hotness, and I was just... Aryn. Green eyed, curly blonde haired Aryn that was a little on the mousy side. He smiled winningly at me as he gave me the "damage" as he called it.

Madeline tapped me in the ankle with her foot and widened her eyes at me. I took a deep breath.

I smiled back at the salesman, and... froze. His name was Ron. He didn't look much like a Ron.

I had no idea how to do this. Eye contact! It took eye contact, so I stared Ron in the eye. He stared back, patiently, though he was starting to take on a slightly puzzled look, maybe even a little concerned. It was probably concern for my sanity. Can't say I blamed him. Okay, so I had eye contact. Except for the really powerful vampires, it seemed that was usually key to getting into someone's head. I had experience being on the receiving end of this, but this was my first real attempt at gaining access to someone else's mind. I had usually felt some pressure at the base of my skull, like someone pressing their fingers to the back of my head. I went with that idea and imagined pressing my fingers against Ron's head.

I picked up a pair of shoelaces on display and tossed them down on top of the shoe boxes.

"So much for a pair of shoe laces?" I asked. "Are you sure?"

I heard Madeline sigh beside me, but I didn't break eye contact with Ron. He was definitely looking confused now. I hoped that was a good sign.

"You don't want the shoes?" He asked.

Okay... that didn't work. Madeline snickered, then pushed me aside. She snapped her fingers to get Ron's attention.

"Hold on a minute, m'kay?" She said to him, and his face went kind of blank. She turned to me.

"You didn't even try." She placed a manicured hand on her hip and cocked her head at me.

"I don't know what I'm doing," I hissed back through my teeth. "I _did_ try. And this is embarrassing. Not to mention dishonest!"

Madeline snorted. "So you pay next time. Today, you learn how to do it this way. You'll need this skill to get by, and believe me, you'll need it for far more than shopping. Hunting, gaining information, subduing someone, making someone forget they saw you, getting a sense of ones intentions or feeding them new ones... darling, this is important. And you need to get an idea of how it works before we go back to the house tonight."

"Why?" I looked at her, suspicion drawing my eyes into a squint. "What happens when we get home?"

"You'll see soon enough, so let's not ruin our fun." She pulled me back into position in front of Ron and the counter. "First, eye contact. You had that. Then focus on the blood rushing through your veins. Rein it in, take control of it, use the energy stored in your blood and project what thoughts you want your target to have while you speak to him."

"Okay, but Madeline? My heart isn't beating. So, you know... my blood isn't rushing anywhere."

"I'm going to hit you in a second." Madeline smiled sweetly. "Pretend it is. Your heart is beating, albeit slowly. You can make it beat faster if that helps you get the job done. Just... do it."

She snapped her fingers again and Ron's eyes snapped back to mine, the blank look gone. He smiled and gave me my total again.

. . . . .

Two stores later, I was getting the hang of things. I was never going to be able to show my face in that mall again though, no matter that Madeline promised nobody would be able to remember what had happened. My second attempt to manipulate Ron's mind had ended with him laughing at me and telling me that I was cute, but not cute enough to get my purchase for free. Madeline had had to reset him, or whatever it was she did. I'd gotten him to do what I wanted on my third try.

We'd hit an accessories store afterward, and then a department store to get me a set of luggage. I'd fared much better, but I wasn't confident enough to try anything on my own yet. I'd likely just get myself arrested.

I had forgotten what Madeline had said about something waiting for me when we got home. When we pulled up the drive and I saw Nathan on the porch, leaning against one of the stone columns, I considered suggesting more shopping to Madeline. She shot me a sympathetic look.

"I'm supposed to have tonight off. I have plans," I told her. "Tonight is not supposed to be for training."

"What do you think we've been doing?" She asked.

"Traitor."

She shrugged, too unashamed to deny it. "But hey, we spiced up your wardrobe and now you're prepared for what Nathan has in store for you. It'll make tonight easier for you. You can play with your human another night."

"Traitor," I said again. "You're going on my list."

She giggled and leaned over to kiss me on the cheek. "I love you too."

I got out of the car and gave Nathan a withering look. He had to have had better things to do than make my life miserable. He just smiled back pleasantly and held his arm out for me. When I hesitated before taking his arm, his eyebrows hitched. Was I going to be difficult? I usually was. I was stubborn, and I didn't like being forced to submit to someone else's will. I was hurting no one but myself by defying Nathan, especially when it was petty little things like this, but I did it anyway. Over and over again. And over and over again, he put me in my place. Yesterday it was burning my belongings. Today? I was tired. I didn't want to go there, so I took his arm.

Madeline handed my bags off to the guard on duty at the front door, and Nathan led me into the house. I had no idea what he had in store for me, but clearly it had to do with mind control. Or whatever you wanted to call it. Unless I got to suggest to Nathan that he go drown himself in the pool, I wasn't looking forward to whatever he had in mind. Though he couldn't really drown himself anyway. He didn't need to breathe. Maybe I could suggest he bludgeon himself to death. Too bad he was too strong for me to actually try that on.

"Do I have time to make a quick phone call?" I asked. I wanted to let Nicky know that I wasn't likely to be able to meet up with him.

"No," Nathan said. And that was that. He paid no mind to me when I released a heavy sigh.

Nathan had once told me he was a nice, easy going, fun loving guy. I'd only met that version of Nathan a few times, and those were times when everything was going exactly the way he wanted them to go. Since he found me to be difficult, stubborn, insubordinate, and resistant to his charms, I didn't exactly inspire him to be that guy he claimed to be. Instead I got the rigid, often cruel, domineering Nathan.

He led me to the ballroom, and I kept my mouth shut and behaved myself.

In the center of the room, three chairs sat side by side, and in them were three people I'd never seen before. They were bound and gagged. Aris stood behind the middle chair, and she beamed a smile at us as we entered the room. She didn't particularly care much for me, but then Aris didn't seem to like anyone but our Master, whom she usually referred to as daddy. She had her moments though. It looked like this might be one of them.

"This is going to be fun!" She grinned at me and giggled, then stepped around the trio of prisoners to stand beside a small table off to the right. She whipped off a white sheet from the table and revealed a tray of silver instruments. "Ta da!"

My stomach sank at the sight of the scalpels, pliers, tweezers, and so many other things that I thought might be medical devices but didn't know the names of. They all looked sterile and shiny, so professional and terrifying. I felt sick.

"What's going on?" I asked, my voice small and quiet.

"You're going to practice on our friends here. Exercise your mind, get a feel for touching the minds of others." Nathan smiled broadly, fangs showing. The three in the chairs, two men and one woman, kept their eyes on the floor. One of the men has tears in his eyes, but all three of them looked terrified.

"And," Aris clapped her hands, "if you screw up, I get to use my toys on them."

"Motivation," Nathan arched an eyebrow at me. "Since you're so fond of the creatures and no doubt will not want them hurt too badly."

"No," I shook my head. "Humans, Nathan. Not some creatures. These are people. They're no different from you and me. We were human too."

Nathan just smiled, but Aris made a sound of disgust.

"Speak for yourself," she said. "I've never been human."

"You look pretty damned human to me," I spat, glaring at her.

She gave me a look that clearly said how little she thought of my intelligence. "Well duh, human body and all."

I turned to Nathan, because any argument with Aris was pointless. Although, that could be said of most any verbal exchange with the girl.

"I'm not doing this."

"You are," Nathan stuffed his hands into his pockets, taking a casual posture. But his tone was firm. "And you'll be doing this for the rest of the night and into the morning if necessary even if I have to send Aris to bring in replacements," he gestured vaguely at the prisoners, "if you fail to keep these in serviceable condition."

"Umm," Aris toyed with one of the scalpels, "Erik only gave me permission to take these three. So we need to try not to break them if you want to use them for a while."

"Erik is okay with this?" I addressed my question to Nathan, though I probably shrieked it more than asked it. I didn't know the vampire to whom I'd sworn my loyalty to all that well, but I couldn't imagine him torturing helpless humans. He seemed like a decent guy…for a vampire.

"Enough," Nathan said, and pulled his hands from his pockets. He moved to stand beside the prisoner in the chair furthest to the left, the man who had tears in his eyes. He was probably the youngest of the three, a few years younger than me. He was probably still in high school. When Nathan tugged the man's gag from his mouth, he began to hyperventilate but he didn't speak. He kept his eyes downcast. He reminded me a little of Nicky in the way he was dressed, with worn jeans and a t-shirt that was even more worn. He lacked something that Nicky had though. He didn't look dangerous. He just looked scared.

Nathan crooked his finger at me. I felt like I was going to throw up.

"Get into his head and find out for yourself why he's here. Our young friend here did something he ought not have. Find out for me Eryn."

That wasn't the same as what Madeline had had me doing. I wasn't sure if it worked the same way, and I thought it was incredibly unfair that I was being expected to perform without being taught _how_. So, as I knelt down before the younger man, I shot a fierce look at Nathan. At least, I hoped it was fierce. Whether it was or not, he just crossed his arms and smiled. Encouragingly. I felt like taking Aris' scalpel and stabbing him in the eye.

"I'm sorry," I told the man. Boy. Whatever. Even though he couldn't be all that much younger than me, I couldn't help but think of him as a kid.

"Please," he sucked in a shaky breath with his plea. My stomach twisted.

"Speak without permission and the cute little brunette over there gets to play with you." Nathan gestured toward Aris, but the guy didn't look at her. Aris giggled.

"Then why did you remove the gag?" I growled.

Nathan arched a brow. "If you don't perform, you get to hear him scream."

I swallowed and bit my tongue on a slew of things I really wanted to say to Nathan, and every one of them would have warranted having my mouth scrubbed out with soap, despite my age. Foul things.

His face softened a bit and he sighed. "You can do it. You need to learn this."

I felt like holding my breath, which was silly because I didn't really need to breathe. I sucked in a breath and held it anyway. The tightness in my chest helped because it gave me a starting point to focus on. I met the kid's eyes, which were wide with fear. He didn't look away from me and he didn't speak again. I focused on that tightness in my lungs and felt for the blood flowing through the veins closest to that tightness. My blood warmed as I took control. I felt my heart beat. Just once. And with this power that I didn't understand, I stared into his muddy brown eyes and pushed into his mind.

I hit a wall. I couldn't tell if he was trying to block me from entering his thoughts or if I was just doing it wrong, but there it was. I pushed at it and it pushed back. I snapped back to myself. I gave Nathan a hurried, nervous glance, and tried again.

Instead of pushing at the wall, this time I let my mind explore its surface like the touch of fingers, I brushed across it and looked for an edge. There was nothing. It wraped around his thoughts like a shield and I found myself back where I'd started.

"He's blocking me," I said.

"I doubt it," Nathan sounded almost bored now.

"There's a wall, Nathan." I insisted.

"Then punch through it, fast and hard."

Aris snickered.

"I can't." I stood and crossed my arms.

"Okay," Nathan shrugged. "Go ahead love."

Aris waved a red vine licorice at Nathan. She still had the scalpel in her other hand. "Don't call me love."

She stuck the licorice in her mouth and smiled around it, then approached the boy sitting before me. Taking a fistful of his hair in her hand, she pulled his head back so she could have a better look at him. She held the scalpel close to his face in the other hand, and she looked him over as though she were trying to decide what to do with him.

The kid laughed. I could have mistaken it for a sob, but there was no mistaking the smile on his face. It was gone as quickly as it had come, and he was back to looking terrified again. The poor kid was probably on the verge of hysteria or something. Who could blame him?

"I think..." Aris cocked her head to the side. "I think I'll take his eyebrows. They remind me of fuzzy little caterpillars. I could glue them together and make a pet for myself. I'll name him Harry and carry him around in my pocket."

With the licorice hanging from between her vaguely smiling lips, she winked at me before very gently pressing the tip of the scalpel into the boy's flesh, between his eyes where his right eyebrow was thickest. It began to bleed immediately and his blood dripped like hard sweat from his brow into his eye. He squeezed his eyes shut and his face twisted against the pain, but he didn't cry out. Aris cut around the curve of his eyebrow as though she were tracing a cut-out with an Exact-O knife.

"Stop!" I shouted. "Come on Nathan, stop her. What's wrong, you don't have the stomach to do it yourself? You have to make a little girl do your dirty work for you?"

Nathan arched an eyebrow at me. "It's what she does."

Aris giggled as she continued to cut. The boy was gasping now, but he still didn't cry out.

"Pussy," I growled, glaring at Nathan with every drop of hatred I could muster.

He sighed. "Aris, step aside."

Aris did not, but she did jerk the scalpel back. Then she fixed me with a glare of her own for interrupting her fun. Nathan reached for the boy's face and, with a movement so fast that I nearly missed it, he grabbed the inner edge of the boy's eyebrow and jerked his hand away. The flesh peeled away, taking most of the eyebrow with it.

I screamed. The boy screamed.

Nathan very calmly handed the eyebrow to Aris, who scowled down at it in disgust.

"I can't use that. It's broken." She said.

The boy jerked back and forth in his chair, yowling while blood ran down over his eye.

I turned around and ran for the doors. I couldn't watch that. I couldn't be a part of it.


	4. Chapter 4

I was at the doors, had them open, before Nathan caught me. He got hold of my arm and turned me around to face him, but before he could speak I started screaming at him.

"I'm done! If you want me to learn this shit, I'll learn it, but not like this. I'm not doing this. You sick fucking bastard! What the hell is wrong with you? I am out of here."

I tried to jerk my arm out of his grip, but he held on without much effort.

"Where do you think you're going to go?" He asked me, very calmly. I could barely hear him over the screaming.

"Away from here," I spat.

"Alright," he said. "Let's go."

He leg go of my arm, but took hold of the back of my neck instead. He wasn't gentle.

He led me down the hallway, through the entryway, and out the front doors of the house. There was a small parking lot to the right of the circular driveway with half a dozen spots. My car sat in one of them. Nathan led me straight to it.

Was he kicking me out of the house? I didn't understand what was happening.

"I don't have my keys," I said stupidly. Nathan ignored me.

We stepped around the car until we stood directly in front of it. Finally, he took his hand off my neck. I stood beside him and watched as he hooked his fingers around the front edge of the hood of my car and with a sharp jerk, pulled the hood open. There was a whine as the metal twisted and tore. I gaped at the wound left on my car. I couldn't afford to have it repaired. But he wasn't finished. I didn't know if Nathan knew much about cars. I didn't know anything. But he reached his hands in and tore things away from the engine. Hoses were torn out and tossed on the ground, followed by rubber belts, then what I thought were a few spark plugs. Something else followed, a flat piece of metal that I didn't know the name of. I didn't know if it was important. When he was done murdering my car, he turned to regard me solemnly.

"You murdered my car." I said, still sounding stupid. I wasn't angry yet. I was too confused and surprised to reach that emotion yet. "Why did you do that? You could have just refused to let me leave the house." Okay, the anger was surfacing again. "Dammit Nathan, that was my car. You are paying for that."

"You're right." He said. "I could have refused to let you out of the house."

"Fuck you," I said. Really, I had nothing better to say to him. I was in no frame of mind for coming up with anything else.

He took my arm again and led me back towards the house. I didn't struggle this time. I cried, which was just as useless. As we passed through the front doors, the guard on duty very pointedly did not look at us. He might as well have been a statue standing there, staring straight ahead behind his sunglasses. It was in the middle of the night, and he was human. Why did he even need sunglasses?

Nathan was pulling me back down the hallway towards the ballroom. So, I wasn't getting out of anything. My car really had gotten torn up for nothing.

"I hate you," I muttered quietly, plenty loud enough for him to hear me.

He stopped, jerking me to a halt with him. With surprising gentleness, he pushed me up against the wall. I cringed back, but there was nowhere for me to go.

"I know you do, Eryn. I don't need you to like me. I don't have to be your friend. But you do need to grow up. You need to listen to me, and you need to start doing what I tell you. This is important. Right now you're completely vulnerable. Any one of us out there with the most rudimentary knowledge of compulsion could make you do whatever the hell they wanted. Do you realize how easy it would be for me to make you go in there and do anything I liked? It would be effortless, and you'd enjoy doing it. You'd do it well. But you wouldn't learn anything. You're never going to learn anything by having me force your hand. So I'm okay with being the bad guy, because Eryn? This is the most valuable lesson you're ever going to learn, I can promise you. You learn this, and you have gained the mental strength to keep people out. It's that easy."

I brushed the tears away, but I still wasn't ready to go back in that room. "Okay, fine. But why this? The stuff with Madeline wasn't really hurting anybody. I almost even liked it after I got the hang of it. But this? It's just sick."

Nathan shook his head. "If you can't handle what's going on in that room, then you're not going to survive. Our existence isn't pretty. We live violent lives. And those people in there? They deserve what they get. They're in there with Erik's approval. You think he's the kind of man who'd be that wasteful? They're being punished, Eryn. Don't give them your pity, because they don't deserve it. When you're ready to move past this and do what you're supposed to do, you'll see that. Get in their heads and see for yourself. I guarantee you won't care how much Aris hurts them."

I didn't believe him, but I brushed past him to return to the ballroom anyway. What else could I do? Nathan caught me around the waist before I could take more than a couple of steps. Whether he meant it to be comforting or condescending, I didn't know. Either way, I chose to ignore the gesture, because with Nathan it could also have been meant to remind me that he practically owned me. I so didn't want to go there.

Aris had been busy. The right side of the kid's face was bandaged and most of the blood had been wiped away. He wasn't screaming anymore, but his mouth gaped open and he breathed heavily. His left eye was looking a little glassy.

She stood behind the woman, plaiting her hair into tiny blonde braids. The woman had her eyes closed and she breathed evenly despite her gag, but her hands were clenched into fists. The older man still stared at the floor.

I knelt in front of the kid again and repeated the process of holding my breath and taking hold of the blood inside my body. I'd have to ask sometime why this did anything. I suspected I'd get an answer along the lines of, "Your blood is your power." or some such nonsense, but I was always asking questions. Knowing the details of a thing, especially a scary thing, made that thing less scary. Sometimes.

I only had one eye to lock onto this time and it took me snapping my fingers in front of the kid's face to get his attention so he'd look at me, but it worked. And this time when I met that wall, less substantial this time, I followed Nathan's advice and gave it as heavy a mental jab as I could. It might not have been necessary. The wall broke away as soon as I touched it.

He wasn't as scared as he looked, even with the pain he was in. Not by half. He was, however, extremely proud of the fact that he was good enough to fool the bloodsuckers. He knew they'd figure it out. He thought they'd be impressed. He also thought they would have been impressed by his ability to take those young girls and slaughter them without leaving enough clues behind for the police to figure out who was responsible. He hadn't enjoyed killing them at first. The first couple had been quick kills. Merciful really, but when he saw how good he was at evading detection, it had gotten fun. He'd gotten more creative.

Images flashed through my head like snapshots of his victims. He signed his murders in blood. It was everywhere. He wasn't a vampire. Not yet. He couldn't drink the blood without making himself sick, so he drained the girls and painted the rooms he left them in. He thought of it as a gift, and he thought his generosity would gain him immortality. But really, it was the power that he craved. The never having to die part was just icing.

He worked at the hospital, or had. He'd stolen equipment, and he'd used that to drain the girls. He'd been careful where he inserted the I.V. so that it would difficult to spot. He favored the pubic area, but more than one of his victims had been shaved. He'd been forced to get creative. After they'd been drained, he'd used the canine tooth from a dog he'd killed to make two punctures in their throats. He knew it wouldn't fool anyone, but that wasn't the point.

He'd gotten the attention of the vampires all right. It wasn't going exactly like he'd hoped, but he was still feeling pretty confident. His mom was a werewolf. He'd grown up hearing about how nasty vampires could be. What he'd done couldn't possibly offend them, so he didn't buy that they were so pissed off about the trouble he'd been causing. He didn't buy it at all. This was probably all a test. They just wanted to see how he held up under pressure or something. When they saw what he was made of, they'd turn him.

I squeezed my eyes shut and shook my head. As soon as I broke eye contact, the contact with his mind was also severed. I didn't want to see more.

"You were right," I said. "You should snap his neck." My voice was cold and void of the emotion I felt. I really wanted to throw up.

"Too easy," Aris said. "If you can't think of anything better than that, I have some books I could loan you. Human history is full of all sorts of creative ways to kill. Did you know you could keep someone alive for years with nothing more than..."

Nathan waved her to silence, and she huffed at him. I didn't mind. I had no desire to know how to keep someone alive for years with nothing more than... whatever. Something horrid, I was sure. Ick.

"What did you see?" He asked.

I told him, and as I did, the kid lifted his head and stared at me. His mouth slowly twitched into a satisfied smile.

"What are you going to do with him?" I asked.

Nathan shrugged. "Nothing. Give him to his own people and let them deal with him. They'll take care of him."

The kid's smile vanished, and with that, Aris replaced his gag.

Werewolves. The kid's own people were werewolves. I didn't know what they'd do with him, but I was pretty sure the fear I saw in the kid's eyes was genuine this time.

I encountered no walls with the other two, and I was able to enter their thoughts with no trouble. The woman worked (in other words, she was a blood slave) for some vampire that I'd not yet met. Basically she acted as her vampire mistress's secretary. The vampire, a woman by the name of Sabine, had trusted the woman with endless secrets. Years worth of secrets. The woman had been recording them in a journal. Sabine hadn't been pleased when she'd discovered this. The book had been full of damning evidence, and not just about her, but about all vampires in general. Erik hadn't been pleased either. To avoid his wrath, Sabine had turned her servant over to him along with the book. Apparently Erik had a temper that I hadn't seen before. This woman hadn't either. She hadn't met Erik until Sabine had turned her over to him, but she'd heard all about his lapses into a blind rage that usually ended with someone's death. Unlike the boy, she was far, far, far more frightened than she looked. I did feel bad for her. She was stupid for doing what she'd done, but she hadn't had malicious intentions. She just wanted leverage in case anything happened. She hadn't thought it through.

The older man was also a blood slave, but he no longer had a master. He'd killed him. Like the boy, he also wanted to become a vampire. Unlike the boy, he wasn't concerned about power or immortality. He just wanted out. He didn't want to be under someone's thumb anymore, with no life to call his own. As I saw it, he'd had it pretty good. He was a medical examiner, and his master hadn't asked a whole lot of him. He'd been expected to help with the occasional cover-up, but they were pretty rare. The vampires in the area were careful. He'd staked his master, taken a pint of his blood and mixed it with a pint of his own blood. Then he'd consumed the whole lot of it. It hadn't worked.

"You did good," Nathan said with a smile. He actually looked proud. For some reason, that really annoyed me. I was a little proud of myself though. It had been easier than what Madeline had had me do, but it was far more exhausting. My whole body felt heavy.

"I think you've earned tomorrow off." He said.

Thank God. "Thank you," I said. Not that Nathan was God. But I was grateful for a night without training.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Four

I was back at the mall. People streamed by me, paying me no notice. It was pretty dark too, but nobody seemed to notice that either. Nicky walked past me, and like everyone else, he didn't so much as glance in my direction. But I noticed him, and when he passed by, I followed him. He smelled good, and I was hungry.

I called out his name, but he didn't hear me. I walked faster, trying to catch up, but he seemed to remain at the same distance no matter how fast I moved. He didn't hurry though, but walked along in a casual manner along with everyone else. The number of people streaming by was growing. Before long, I wouldn't be able to see Nicky through the crowd.

He paused at the entrance to a hallway leading to conference rooms and a service exit. I continued toward him, but even though he stood still, I didn't seem to get any closer to him. He turned and disappeared down the hallway. I started running.

I made it to the mouth of the hallway and could see him, already towards the end of the hall where it took a turn to the left. A few seconds more and I would lose him. I called out to him again as he turned the corner. Again, I ran. The hallway stretched ahead of me as my feet pounded across the floor. I reached the corner where Nicky had turned and there he was again. So close this time. He was waiting for me.

I turned the corner and finally, I stood before him. We were no longer in the hallway though. There was asphalt beneath our feet, moist with something that smelled sharp and rotten. A dumpster sat nearby, covered in graffiti. For some reason, I was sure that if I approached it and opened the lid, I'd find bodies piled inside.

When I looked back at Nicky, he was wearing a bandage over his right eye. I wasn't sure why, but it troubled me. I reached up and tore it away. Beneath it, he was perfect. I was disappointed and my fingers hooked into claws. I was sure there was supposed to be blood. I wanted blood.

Yes, I was hungry. How could I forget? The unpleasant smell of the alley faded away and all I could smell was Nicky, who was so warm, who I knew would feel so good against me if I would just take that last step towards him and press my body into his. He was mine. I could claim him.

He reached his hand up towards my face and I grabbed his wrist. Bones snapped beneath my fingers and ground against each other like gravel. I was right. He was warm. I bared my fangs.

"Hey dead girl," he said with that teasing smile I loved so much.

He was right. I was dead. But he wasn't, and as he bent his head toward me and his scent filled my senses, I released his wrist and wrapped my hand around his throat instead. Then I bit him.

I woke up screaming, my body jerking and twitching. I made no noise though, because my lungs were empty. When I was awake enough to realize what I was doing, I ceased the silent screams and sucked in a breath of air. It came back out in a loud groan. My body was on fire. I had felt like this once before, only this was much worse. My first experience in the sun as a vampire, before I'd known what I was, had left me sick and in pain. I'd felt like I'd been cooked from the inside out, my blood boiling away inside my body. My veins had turned black. But this time, I hadn't been in the sun.

I tried to lift my arm to see if the black veins had come back. It took a lot of effort, but after several long minutes I managed to pull my arm up a few inches so I could see it. My skin looked exceedingly pale, blue almost, but otherwise flawless. My arm dropped back to the bed. I couldn't move. I struggled, but I only managed more jerking and twitching. I tried to roll over, but I couldn't get the momentum going to flip myself over. I couldn't do anything but lie there and gasp in agony.

My headboard was against the wall I shared with Derek. He was likely sleeping in his own room, mere feet away from me. If I could rock enough to bang the headboard against the wall, maybe I could wake him up. The walls were well insulated though. Vampires had sensitive hearing, and the sound proofing allowed us some privacy. If banging against the wall didn't work, the only other way anyone would hear me was through the window or my bedroom door. The window was shuttered and covered by heavy drapes. It was unlikely there would be anyone close enough outside that they'd hear me shouting. Nathan's room was directly across the hall though.

I didn't even know if I could shout yet. My brain was sluggish. I wasn't thinking clearly.

I jerked my body. The bed shook beneath me, but my headboard didn't budge. I continued to groan, I could hear myself, though I didn't think I had much of a conscious effort in the noises I was making. I sucked in another breath.

"Nathan," I screamed. Okay, I could do that. I tried again. "Nathan!"

Aris was probably up and about. She tended to sleep through part of the night because she loved being out in the sun. It was possible she liked it because she enjoyed reminding us that she could, and we couldn't.

"Aris!" I screamed for her this time. Her room was further down the hall and she was as likely as not to ignore me even if she did hear me. "Nathan!"

I gasped, and then I just stopped because I was so tired that I didn't want to spend the energy on the effort of taking another breath. I still groaned, but no sound escaped my lips. My body twitched. I could feel my fingers digging into my mattress, and I hoped vaguely that I wasn't shredding my bedding. They matched my wallpaper.

My door opened, and the light in my room was switched on. For the first time ever, I was happy about the lack of a lock on my door. Not that a lock would have kept Nathan from opening my door, but still. His hair was tousled. It was cute.

"I'm not your mother, Eryn. You don't get to wake me up when you have a nightmare." He looked drowsy, but despite his words he approached me in my bed and looked down at me. "Shit," he said.

"I can't move." I said. I had to pull in a breath to say it, and it wasn't worth the effort. If not for the pain, I could just close my eyes and go back to sleep. I thought I might not wake up again if I did, but that didn't sound so bad.

"You need blood," Nathan said. He didn't look drowsy anymore. "Now."

He flipped my blankets back and scooped me up into his arms. My head lolled backward while he carried me out of my room and rushed down the hallway with me. I didn't know where he was taking me. I couldn't think past the pain. If I needed blood, why not just let me bite him? His bicep was right there next to my mouth. I could just pull my lips back and sink my teeth into his muscle. There was blood there, right?

Nathan made a sound that didn't sound at all pleased and I wondered what the problem was. He was bounding down the stairs, jostling me in his arms. There was something warm in my mouth, but it wasn't enough. I need more.

We moved through the house, where it was dark, the windows all shuttered against the light of day. I gasped in shock as I was deposited onto a cold, hard surface and the warmth was ripped away from my mouth. A light came on, stinging my eyes. We were in the kitchen and I was lying on the counter top. Nathan's arm was bleeding. I wondered why. My body was still twitching and I hoped I didn't twitch myself right off onto the floor.

Nathan was pulling something out of the refrigerator, then moving whatever he took to the microwave. It hummed to life and he pulled a cupboard open. It annoyed me and I wanted to yell at him, but I didn't want to have to suck in another breath to do it. He shouldn't have been fixing himself breakfast though, not when I was lying there in so much pain.

The microwave beeped and he pulled the contents back out. I couldn't see what he did. I think he shook something. And then the smell hit me. It was wonderful. I wanted it.

I could hear someone growling and I wanted to growl back at them. What Nathan had, it was mine. I wanted it.

He rushed over to me, carrying the source of that wonderful smell. He looked worried, and I wondered if he was afraid that whoever was growling was going to take it away from him. I wouldn't let them.

Nathan put a hand behind my neck and lifted my head, letting it tip back a bit. I didn't mind, because that smell was so close now. And then he was pouring something into my mouth and I swallowed greedily.

"I'll save ripping your head off for being so stupid a few minutes longer," he said. "I want you fully alert when I tell you what an idiot you are."

What a thing to say.

He'd been pouring the liquid down my throat for a while before I could put a name to it. Blood. I'd been squeamish about it in the past, but not now. I couldn't get enough of it. When I could move again, Nathan helped me sit up and I took the cup in my own hands and drank. While I worked on emptying it, he filled another one.

"How long have you been starving yourself?" He asked me.

I blinked at him over the rim of the cup I drank from. When it was empty, he pulled it away from me.

"How long?" He asked again, angry.

"I wasn't starving myself." I said. I couldn't understand why he would think that. I had been perfectly fine a few hours earlier.

"If you hadn't woken me up, you might have been catatonic by nightfall. Do you know how difficult it is to bring a vampire back from that? It's like hibernation, only you don't get to wake up when you get hungry. You just stay asleep forever."

"I wasn't, I swear." I grab the other cup he offered me and take a long pull from it. "I was fine when I went to bed."

"When's the last time you fed?" I watched as he tossed the empty cup into the garbage. I didn't want him to do that, because it probably meant the cup I was holding was the last of the blood he had ready for me to drink.

"I don't know," I said. I tried to think. "It's been a few days."

His face twisted, went through an interesting change of colors, and I could almost taste the enormous amount of frustration and fury as it passed through him. I wasn't quite back to normal yet, my brain was still a little foggy, so I probably wasn't nearly as worried about that as I should have been. I had enough sense to know he wasn't happy with me though. I had screwed up.

"You can't do that. A few days?" He paced across the kitchen, muttering to himself. "Stupid. That was stupid. Maybe, _maybe_ if you'd spent a few days on your ass taking up space you could get away without feeding for a few days. You've been working your ass off training every night. You need to feed _every_ night. I don't care if you don't think you're hungry. Those mental exercises last night? All the physical stuff is nothing compared to that. What do you think you're doing to gain access to someone's mind? You're burning through your blood. You have to replace it. A few days. Christ, it's a wonder you could make contact with their thoughts at all."

He stopped his ranting and looked at me.

"I didn't know," I whispered.

"Clearly," he said. "You don't know anything."

"I'm sorry," I said, putting the cup down. It was empty anyway. "I'll try harder."

"I know you didn't choose this life. I know you're not happy, but you can't pull shit like this. If you're going to kill yourself by forgetting something as basic as feeding yourself, just save me a lot of trouble by telling me right now. I don't want to waste my time. If you want out, there are easier ways to do it."

"No," I gripped the edge of the counter. "You're right, I know, I'm sorry. I swear I'll do better. I'm sorry I've been difficult. I've been... unpleasant. I've been ungrateful. It will stop."

"Yeah, well..." he crossed his arms over his chest, but he didn't look as furious with me as he had. He looked tired. "Go back to bed. You should be okay now, but I'll check on you tonight. You'll probably need to feed again when you get back up. Just... get some sleep. I'll deal with you later."

He looked like he wanted to say more, but he shook his head and walked out of the kitchen. I forgot to thank him for saving me.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Five

The next time I woke up, I felt like a whole new person. I felt good, my body refreshed and renewed, strong and full of energy. I was also hungry as hell. Not quite teeth gnashing hungry, but a tingling in my veins kind of hungry. It was a little like someone had carbonated my blood so that it fizzed and popped its way along. It wasn't awful, but you sure as hell noticed it.

I called Nicky, since I hadn't had a chance to the night before. He was still up for pretending to feed me fattening dessert, so I asked him to come pick me up. I hadn't forgotten about Nathan killing my car, though it felt like that had happened a long time ago rather than just the night before. Nicky still had my bags from the other night too and promised to sneak them up to my room, which reminded me I had a bunch of new stuff that I hadn't looked through yet. That was enough to brighten my night in itself, because woo, new stuff was fun and having your old stuff not get burned to ash was certainly something to be happy about.

I got off the phone and retrieved my bags of goodies from the mall that one of the nameless, sunglasses wearing zombie guards had brought up to my room. I dumped them out onto my bed and began pawing through them. Madeline hadn't done a bad job. She'd actually made some attempt at choosing things for me, and not just stuff that she'd like. No jeans, but there was a pair of butter-soft leather motorcycle pants. Where they'd come from, I had no idea. They sure as hell hadn't come from that fancy dress shop Madeline had dragged me in.

Leather wasn't something that had often graced my wardrobe. Maybe a jacket or two, but pants? No. I wriggled my way into them and considered calling Nicky back to make sure he picked me up on his bike instead of borrowing one of the Family's army of black Crown Victorias, but I let it go. The pants looked good enough that I'd wear them regardless. They were snug around the waist and hugged my thighs in a flattering way, but fluted out over my lower legs in a boot cut. I just happened to have the perfect pair of boots to go with them. I threw those on along with a dark burgundy colored top that showed off my curves. I liked the end result. It was feminine in a slightly bad ass sort of way without being trashy. I just hoped Nicky would enjoy me in them as much as he would peeling them all back off again. I blushed at the thought, then bounded downstairs to get something to eat.

At the bottom of the stairs, I noticed the door to the library was just barely cracked open. It caught my attention because I'd never seen it closed before. Thinking a breeze had caught it or something, I went to push it back open, but was stopped by the sound of Nathan's voice.

"... threatened to stake me." He laughed.

The blood in my veins ran cold.

"An empty threat, or have you pushed her too far?"

That was Erik's voice. My stomach flip flopped. Nathan was tattling on me to our Master? I gritted my teeth.

"She needs to be pushed. But no, I'm not going to start blocking my door during the day. If she ever attacks me, I don't think it'll be with a stake."

I couldn't see Nathan's face, but I could hear that sardonic smile of his in his voice. Maybe I wouldn't stake him, but I'd like to rake that smile off his face with my claws.

I looked down at my fingernails, chewed and stubby. I sighed.

"I'd hope that if she were going to try and do me in, she'd be smarter than that." He said.

I wasn't sure what that was supposed to mean.

"Aside from provoking her at every chance like a child on the playground, how is she progressing?" Erik asked.

"I have to provoke her." Nathan sounded defensive now. "She's stubborn. It's the only way to get her to perform at the levels she's capable of. If she's not in a rage, she's merely adequate. When she sheds her inhibitions, she's phenomenal. No disrespect to Bhavna and Aris, but it took them hours of torture and compulsion to get the information out of those three that it took her minutes to tap into. And she was working on fumes. The stupid bint's been starving herself. If she ever learns to stop holding back, she's going to be more than formidable."

I felt a tap on my shoulder and nearly jumped out of my skin. I turned around, face aflame, to find myself facing Bhavna. She was Erik's second-in-command or lieutenant or something. Just then she had her arms crossed over her chest and she was regarding me with one of those "I caught you red handed" sort of looks. Though, that might have been my guilty conscience at work.

"Are our ears burning, Miss Carter?" She said cooly. Bhavna was always cool though, unless she was in the company of her husband. I'd rarely seen her show any form of emotion without him around.

I opened my mouth to speak, but she stalled my words by drawing me away from the door.

"How careless of Erik to leave the door open, and how very unlike him. One would almost suspect he intended to be overheard." She gave me a meaningful look, which I felt ill equipped to ascertain the meaning of. But then she smiled, if subtly. "Off you go."

I smiled gratefully at her for letting me get away with my eavesdropping and made my way to the kitchen.

I was just cleaning up in the kitchen after my meal when Nicky walked in. He whistled when he saw me, which made me blush all over again because it just made me imagine again how I hoped our evening would end.

He took my hand and kissed it, which made me snort because it was such an antiquated thing to do. Nicky was hardly a thug, but he looked like one and the idea of a thug kissing his lady's hand was giggle-worthy material.

With a grin, he tugged me closer to him then wrapped an arm around my waist and kissed me much more properly. He nipped my lip. "You taste like blood."

My face must have registered the horror I felt because he hugged me and laughed. "That's almost as cute as when you blush. Don't worry about it." He kissed me again as if to prove he wasn't bothered by it. "Ready?"

I nodded.

He still had hold of my hand and as he led me from the kitchen, I realized I'd yet to say a word to him. I didn't have time to dwell on my own awkwardness though, because we ran into Nathan on our way to the front of the house.

"Nate," Nicky greeted him with a grinning mouth full of teeth.

Nathan's eyes narrowed at the name, but he didn't rise to the bait this time. He looked me up and down.

I hadn't had a chance to digest what I'd overheard, so I dropped my eyes and refused to look at him.

"Stop drooling. It's unbecoming of a vampire your age." Nicky chuckled and pulled me along behind him. I dared a look back at Nathan on our way out, but he'd already disappeared into the kitchen.

"Mature," I said after we were safely outside the house. Nicky had indeed brought his Buell, and he handed me his helmet before straddling the bike.

He shrugged. "Guys mature slower than women, you know."

"So what, you're twelve?" I asked.

He furrowed his brow at me. "Now you're just being mean. I'm at least as mature as a fifteen year old girl." He stopped, thinking about it a moment, then added, "Well, maybe a mature fourteen."

I shook my head and he helped me mount the bike behind him, where I wrapped my arms around him. I wasn't used to the bike yet and still feared falling off. He swore I was going to end up breaking his ribs with the way I squeezed him. But even so, the bike was kind of a turn on. It was the whole bad boy thing. I couldn't help myself.

The bike roared to life, ending any conversation and we lurched forward. That's when my grip around Nicky tightened and I could feel all the muscles under his skin tighten as well. Oh yeah, the bike was a turn on.

We rolled down the driveway, past the gate, and out onto the street. It had rained earlier, though the night was clear now. Everything shone wetly under the streetlights, giving the world a bit of a glow. Of course, that might also have been steam from the sewers brought on by the unseasonably cool night. I didn't think that was fitting for the mood I was in though, so I pretended it was fog instead.

Nicky gunned the engine and we shot off down the street, passing by a familiar silver Buick. I twisted around the best I could to watch the car head off in the opposite direction. When I turned back around, frowning, I saw that Nicky had his head twisted around to watch the car as well. I couldn't guess what he was thinking by the look on his face, which revealed nothing at all. He turned his eyes back to the road before putting us in danger of crashing and we took off. Still, I couldn't help but wonder why Ben was driving down my street.

. . . . .

I wasn't dressed for the restaurant Nicky took me to. Fortunately, we weren't staying. We took a seat at the bar and Nicky put an order in for a single slice of cheesecake to go and a vodka martini.

The restaurant wasn't quite one of those jackets required type places, but it was definitely more upscale than I was used to. During the two years I'd been with Ben, I'd become more accustomed to the definition of a fancy night out entailing a movie and dinner at anywhere without a drive-thru window. We hadn't had a lot of money to throw around and I'd been habitually out of work. It wasn't so much finding work that I had trouble with as it was keeping a job once I found it. Bosses tended to use the same types of words to describe me as Nathan had. Stubborn and emotional were popular ones. I was going to work on that. Really.

Nicky was feeding me the olive that came speared on a little plastic sword, flavored by his martini when I spotted two of the people I least wanted to see at that moment. And they'd spotted me as well. It didn't look like they'd been seated yet, because they were making a beeline straight for me.

I made a sound like a whimper and Nicky turned to look at what had caught my attention.

"Problem?" He asked.

"Yeah," I said unhappily. "You're about to meet your girlfriend's parents."

His eyes widened for the briefest moment, but for his credit he didn't look worried. At least not for himself. I hadn't seen my parents since I'd become a vampire.

"Eryn!" My mom wrapped herself around me and kissed me on the cheek, plastering me with a copper rose colored imprint of her lips. She picked up a napkin from the bar and started to rub it away. I gave Nicky a look of sheer panic. "Where's Ben? Are you here alone?" She turned to my father. "Frank, go change our reservation. Tell them we have three in our party." She turned back to me. "Or four?"

I gave Nicky another one of those "please God help me" looks. He was taking a drink, but I could tell he was hiding a smile.

"This is my boyfriend, Nicky." I said. My parents both turned to look at him with twin looks of feigned surprise.

"Four then, tell them four." My mother said, sending dad off without asking if we cared to join them.

"I talked to Ben earlier today, you know. He sounded very upset." She pursed her lips at me, but I could see her eyes darting to check Nicky out. My mom could be discreet when she wanted to be. She just rarely bothered.

"Why are you talking to Ben? You don't even like him." If he'd resorted to trying to recruit my mother in his attempts at getting back together with me, I was going to kill him.

"He called me, what was I supposed to do? Some of us have manners. I don't hang up on people." She said, still convinced that I had done just that a few weeks earlier. I hadn't. We'd been talking on the phone when I'd received proof of the whole vampires and sunlight not mixing thing. So yeah, my phone etiquette had suffered a little when I'd been forced to leave the room, screaming in agony.

"He shouldn't be bothering you. I've moved on. He needs to get a life and... go away." I made a face. "What did he want?"

Nicky watched our exchange with polite passivity, nursing his martini.

"He said he was worried about you." She glanced at Nicky. "Said you'd run off with an older man and were hanging out with criminal types."

I laughed. I couldn't help it. "Criminal types?" I giggled.

Nicky extended his hand towards my mom. "Nicky Spencer."

My mom shook his hand. "Karen," she said. "You don't look Italian. Are you mafioso?"

I giggled again, and my mom gave me a dirty look.

"No ma'am." Nicky smiled politely.

"Oh, no ma'aming me, please. It makes me feel old." She turned to me. "He doesn't look that old. Nothing wrong with an older man, they can teach you a thing or two." She turned back to Nicky again. "Are you teaching my daughter a thing or two?"

I figured it was his turn to give me one of those horrified, pleading looks but he didn't miss a beat. He just smiled and said, "I sure hope so, Karen."

Mom nodded. "Good. She's been too sheltered. I didn't approve of her last fellow; he didn't let her breathe." She linked her arm with Nicky's and pulled him away from the bar and his martini. I followed, boots thumping the ground heavier than necessary in my reluctance.

Dad had managed to secure a table for the four of us regardless of the short notice. We tried to beg off, saying we'd already eaten, but my dad insisted we order drinks at least. There was no polite way to escape and Nicky was getting along wonderfully with my mother, so he didn't seem in a hurry to get away. When we took our seats, I gave him a little kick under the table and matched it with a nasty look that promised future revenge when he looked at me. He just winked at me.

"You're looking pale," my mom said to me. "Are you taking iron supplements?"

It had taken longer than I'd expected for a comment to be made on my appearance. It hadn't changed significantly when I'd been turned, but the differences were there. Pale skin came with the territory to be sure, but it wasn't as if I was bone white and looked dead. I just looked pale. My hair had also lightened, along with my eye color. Everything just looked... bleached. But instead of looking washed out, I actually looked healthier. I didn't even need to wear makeup anymore.

"Nope," I said. "But I am trying a new iron-rich diet." I thought that might be true. Blood was high in iron, right? Maybe it was.

"You look wonderful." She said. "But are you sure your new friends aren't mobsters? You know, I hear they beat their women."

"I wouldn't hit her, Karen." Nicky said. "Her bite is much sharper than mine."

I rolled my eyes, but my mom look mollified.

"What happened between you and Ben? I thought I'd be hearing the two of you had run off and gotten married, not that you'd broken up. Not that I'm disappointed. I always thought there was something not right about him. Maybe it's because you were living together. You know once you move in with a man, they're never going to marry you. Was he cheating on you?"

"So," my father broke in. He had been talking quietly with Nicky. I shot him a grateful look for saving me from my mom's battery of questions. At least she never took a pause long enough for me to answer any of them. "Where are you living now?"

I gave them the address and described the house, and my dad nodded in approval of my new digs. "I'm renting a room there." That wasn't true. I didn't pay rent.

After that, an uncomfortable silence fell over us. It wasn't broken until the waitress arrived with my cheesecake, tucked away inside a little Styrofoam box. We excused ourselves shortly after.

As we walked out of the restaurant, Nicky arched an eyebrow at me.

"Yeah," I said. "That was mom…and that was before her bottle of zinfandel."


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Six

We stopped at the video store on the way to Nicky's place and picked up some action flick about assassins that promised lots of gunfire, explosions, and little in the way of actual storyline. It was the perfect movie for... background noise.

I'd never been to Nicky's house before. You'd think in nearly a month of seeing the guy, I'd have managed a glimpse of the place, but fate had not been kind so far. In fact, it had plotted every step of the way to keep us apart as much as possible, and what nights we'd managed to find ourselves in each others' company, well... there was always something ready to cut our time together short. It was frustrating, but Nicky seemed to take it in stride.

We were riding down the street of an older neighborhood. It was one of those areas in decline, yet still managing to cling on to some semblance of respectability. The yards were mostly neat and well cared for, even if the houses were starting to look weathered and aged. But, from Nicky's description of the area, the same could be said of most of the residents. Nicky liked the quiet, older neighbors provided that, and they left him alone because he provided the same. If he wanted otherwise, he took it elsewhere and kept it away from his home.

He pulled the bike into the driveway of a one and a half story, yellow bungalow with a postage stamp sized yard surrounded by a cute white picket fence. There was a rusted old lady of a Mustang up on blocks in the driveway, and when Nicky helped me down from his Buell, I pointed at it.

"I didn't have you pegged for a redneck."

"Don't dis the car, lady. She's a classic." He ran a hand lovingly across its rusted exterior. "Just you wait, someday I'll get her restored to her former glory."

I gave the car a doubtful look, and felt the most ridiculous pang of jealousy. A tiny pang that I'd never admit to.

"Boys and their toys," I sighed.

He gave me a devilish smile and put his arm around my waist, hand resting very low on my hip like he was afraid to let his fingers trail any lower. Sometimes I couldn't figure him out. One minute he was all over me, the next he acted like he was afraid he might offend me. I reached my own arm around him and pinched his ass, grinning when it caught him off guard. Then I grinned wider when he slapped his hand on my own ass... and left it there. Shameless.

"Ready to meet the twins?" He asked.

"I forgot about your dogs," I said. "They're not mean or anything?"

It looked like he had to think about that one, and that wasn't encouraging. "No, they're good girls. Couldn't swear they wouldn't do something if someone was dumb enough to come into the yard with them, but even then I think they'd try to chase whoever it was off before attacking. Mostly they're for show. Big babies."

Then I saw them.

Nicky led me around the old car to a gate in the side of the fence, where his dogs were waiting on the other side. Not only were the two dogs not "twins", but they weren't even the same breed. What they were though, was big. And they didn't look happy to see me. At the sound of Nicky's voice they had been wiggling their bodies in excitement, their tails (stub in the case of the big Rottweiler) wagging vigorously, and whining for his attention. When they saw me, they froze and fixed their brown eyes on me. The brown and white Boxer took a step back, moving away from me. The Rottweiler was braver, but when I looked her in the eyes, she quickly dropped her gaze.

"That's Clover," Nicky pointed at the Rottweiler, and then at the Boxer. "And Michelle."

"They don't like me." I said.

"They react worse to werewolves," he said. "Don't worry, they won't do anything to you while I'm around. And once they've seen you a few times, they'll stop being cowards and warm up to you. It's the whole higher predator thing."

"Okay..." I said, but hoped the whole thing about dogs being able to smell fear wasn't true. Though it wasn't so much that I was afraid as wary. What could they really do to me? Sure, a bite would hurt, but I'd heal quickly. Having previously dated a werewolf, it was probably silly of me to be uncomfortable around large dogs, but there it was. They made me nervous. I blamed my parents for being cat people.

I followed Nicky through the gate, where he gave each of the dogs a pat on the head. They crowded him, sniffing, smelling me on him. Me, they ignored until Nicky took one of my hands in his, fingers entwined and thrust it in Clover's face. I could have kicked him, but the dog just took a quick sniff at our hands and walked away. The other dog followed.

Once in the house with the front door shut firmly between me and the "twins", I sighed heavily.

"I'm going to tell all the other vampires that you're afraid of a couple of dogs, and they're going to kick you out of their vampire club."

"Hush, you." I glared at him, but he still had my hand in his and he was standing very close to me, eyes on mine. It wasn't fair, the way he was looking at me. I couldn't even pretend to be mad. We moved our bodies closer and all I could think about was him grabbing hold of me and kissing me so thoroughly that everything else would just cease to exist.

And just like that, his arms were around me and he had me against the door, nothing separating our bodies but our clothes. He pulled me up, his hands on the backside of my leather pants, and I hooked my legs around his hips. We banged into the door again and one of the dogs barked from outside. I laughed, but then he covered my mouth with his and we didn't surface again until Nicky was panting. I was feeling a little breathless myself.

"I didn't mean to do that." Nicky said, though he didn't exactly sound like he regretted it either.

"I'm not complaining," I mumbled, moving my lips to his ear and kissing my way down his throat. He moaned.

"I don't want you to think this is all I want from you." He slid me down until I was back on my feet and I grunted my disapproval, but he didn't pull away from me.

"It's not your fault," I bit my lip. "I think I accidentally put you up to it. When we came in and you looked at me... I saw it happen. Not exactly the same, but close enough. I think I put it in your head."

He chuckled, which wasn't the reaction I'd feared getting. I thought he'd be angry at the invasion, accidental or not. "I've been thinking about doing that ever since I picked you up at the house tonight."

I bit my lip again and smiled sheepishly.

"Don't think you're going to get away with peeking inside my head though," he bent his head to whisper in my ear. "Bad girls get spankings."

A wave of heat rushed through my body, from the top of my head down to my toes and I felt light headed for a quick second. When it passed, I was left feeling warm and tingly. I hooked my fingers through the belt loops of his jeans and pulled him even closer.

He pulled my hands away, taking them in his. "This is supposed to be a proper date, remember? Why don't I show you around?"

I hadn't even looked around yet; couldn't have told you what the room we stood in looked like. I looked then, and the first thing I noticed was that it was very neat. I don't know if I'd quite expected a bachelor pad littered with empty pizza boxes, beer cans, and dirty laundry... but I hadn't expected this either. It was pretty nice. It was clean, masculine, and uncluttered. And like many a man, electronics seemed to be Nicky's toy of choice. Most of the space of one wall of the living room was taken up by a good sized entertainment system, including a large flat screen television and a many-buttoned sound system that I knew I'd never touch. Talking up shady individuals in dark alleyways must be profitable.

The kitchen was to our left, and... well, it was a kitchen. There wasn't much to see. Nicky's guestroom-slash-office was also to the left, also not much to see, though there were a few Star Wars toys sitting on one of his shelves. I filed that away somewhere for future ribbing. Other than that it was the typical desk and computer, sofa, filing cabinets, and a gun locker, which he laughed about and said was only for show in case he got robbed. He didn't tell me where he really kept his things that went boom. To the right of the living room was his bedroom, which he didn't actually show me, and the bathroom. In the center of the living room's back wall was a sliding glass door to the backyard. Taking a peek outside, I could see his dogs had made their way back there. And so, I was going to stay inside and that concluded the short tour.

"Not going to show me the bedroom?" I smiled, batting my eyelashes.

He laughed. "You go in there, and I'm not letting you back out again."

I growled, because that sounded just fine with me.

He grinned.

"I'm starting to look like a little nympho or something, chasing you around." And I was starting to feel really self conscious too. "We've... more or less... been seeing each other for almost a month. You don't have to keep running for my sake."

Nicky laughed again, shaking his head. I didn't know if he was laughing at me though, and I felt my face grow hot. He put his arm around me and pulled me close.

"I was trying to get in your pants five minutes after you broke things off with your ex. So, yeah... maybe I'm trying to make up for that a little. But I'm not running. We haven't exactly had the opportunity with the way Nate's been running you. Let me pretend to be a gentleman for a couple hours."

I snorted, because he seriously was the biggest gentleman I'd ever dated. That was saying something too. Not that I'd dated a whole lot, but I wasn't the type to go out with a jackass.

He rolled his eyes heavenward. "I'm trying very hard not to drag you off to my bed right now and do very non gentleman type things with you. So come sit on the couch with me for a while, in the dark, and pretend to watch this movie with me."

"And then you won't feel like you're trying to take advantage of me anymore?" I wasn't sure I got his logic, but I thought it was sweet. I kind of wanted to know what those non gentleman type things were though... aside from the obvious of course. And I wanted details.

"And then you'll have to beat me off." He made a face at the same time I started laughing.

He disappeared into the kitchen while I retrieved the video rental and cheesecake (which I'd forgotten all about) from where they'd been dropped in the entryway. I braved his setup enough to get the DVD into his player, but I left the rest to him, then I kicked off my boots and curled up on the couch to wait for him. He returned with a bowl of popcorn.

"Want some?" Nicky held the bowl out to me and I picked up a fluffy kernel and bounced it off his forehead.

"Rude," he said as he caught it and stuffed it in his mouth. "Oh yeah, I forgot..."

I snickered. "That's okay, I like that you can forget."

He made a face while he got the movie started. "Don't do that."

"What?" I looked at him in alarm and sat up, fearing he didn't want me snuggled up next to him or something. I was becoming completely paranoid.

He gave one of my blonde curls a tug and pulled me back in to his side so he could rest his arm around me. "Don't bash yourself. There's nothing wrong with being a vampire."

"Sure," I said, shrugging. Except for the whole being a vampire part. "It has its upsides. Just wait till some idiot tries to mug me. Not that I've ever been mugged, but... well, you know. Should be fun if it ever happens now."

He chuckled. "You'll hand over your purse and he'll be gone before you remember you have fangs."

I gave him a dirty look. "Yeah, well..." He was probably right. "I don't carry a purse."

The black screen slowly turned into a fuzzy shot of someone being targeting through a scope, then jerked into focus. The someone was on the ground before I could flick another piece of popcorn at Nicky.

We settled in, and after a while we actually paid attention to the movie. Mostly. I ended up in his lap somewhere between the assassin being spotted by the police and his miraculous escape via the oversized air ducts of some vacant warehouse. Of course, that was only about fifteen minutes into the film. Nicky's hands had found their way inside my shirt by the time the police stopped scratching their heads and announced they needed to call in the big guns or something. Who wrote this stuff?

Nicky's hand was between my shirt and bra, his thumb just brushing over my nipple when my hip started vibrating. I gasped in response to both. Then Nicky's cell began to chime.

"Shit," he muttered.

We pulled our phones out, and I didn't think it was a coincidence that our phones had gone off at the same time.

HOME. NOW.

I grunted my displeasure at the text message and Nicky showed me his, which amounted to the same thing though it was worded differently.

"Shit," I said in agreement.

"If it were just one of us, I'd be tempted to ignore it."

"I know," I pouted. Then I smiled. "But they don't know where we are. It could take us a while to get there."

He slipped his hand back under my shirt and ran his fingers up my side, which sent a chill up my spine after it. "Don't tempt me. I want a little more from you than a quickie."

I grinned, because a quickie wasn't what I had in mind. What I did have in mind was something else entirely, and it made my face flame to even think about. I'd be even more mortified if he turned me down, so instead I slipped off his lap and got on my knees on the floor in front of him.

He quirked his brow at me and when he reached for my face, I nipped at his fingers.

"You've starred heavily in most of my fantasies these past few weeks." I told him.

"Most?"

I rested my chin on his knee to hide my smile. "There were a few... with pirates. But the rest, all you." I slid my hands up his thighs and moved my body forward until my face was a few inches from his stomach and looked up at him. "I want you. But since we're short on time... I want to do something else before we go."

Lowering my head, I undid the button of his jeans with my teeth. His breath caught. With my tongue, I pulled the zipper into my mouth and tugged it down. It was probably the most porn-worthy move I'd ever made, and I glanced up at him to see if it had the desired affect. His eyes were slightly dilated.

Nicky's hands were clenched where they rested on the back of the couch, like he were forcing them to remain where they were and having trouble keeping them there. His heart was beating a little fast too. He looked down at me, mouth open just enough for me to see his tongue pressed against his front teeth.

"That was..." He swallowed. "That was hot. I liked that."

I fought the urge to giggle. My stomach was a nest of butterflies, but I was aroused at the same time. I freed him from the confines of his jeans, and then his underwear. Tighty whities. Who'd have guessed? I pouted up at him, and teased him with my hands as I did so.

"I've always been a boxers kind of girl myself." I said.

One side of his mouth quirked up. "Wouldn't you know, I've been meaning to switch to boxers. I think I'll have to invest in some. Very soon."

I nodded, giving him a serious look. He grinned back at me... until I lowered my head again. Then his mouth went slack and his eyes closed. He made a sound deep in his throat and shuddered. After another few seconds he opened his eyes again and watched. Another minute later and his hands were in my hair and his breath was coming out in quick, heavy huffs.

"Oh God," Nicky groaned. "I love you."

I froze, my mouth still full of him. A look of terror crossed his eyes. I wasn't sure my face didn't register the same look.

"I did not just say that." He said.

I replaced my mouth with my hand, though I wasn't sure I was any better off with the ability to speak right then. "I can pretend you didn't."

He opened his mouth to speak again, probably to try to reassure me and himself that he didn't mean it, or if he did, he didn't mean to say it... it was too soon to say it either way. But there wasn't anything he could possibly say that wouldn't make it worse. As it was, scary as it was, it was fine. I wasn't going to run away, profess my own love, or demand he own up to his slip of the tongue.

I returned to what I'd been doing, hoping it would be enough to shut him up. Otherwise I'd have to remind him there were teeth awfully close to a very sensitive area of his body and he really shouldn't try sticking his foot in his mouth while they were there. As it was, I did let him feel them. Gently. It worked, and he groaned instead.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Seven

Thirty minutes later, we were back on Nicky's bike, racing towards home. It had come down to me having to be the voice of reason and putting an end to our fun. Not that I'd wanted to, but Nicky had lost all urgency to leave the house. Or let me leave it. But we didn't know why we were being called in, and our texts had been sent from Erik's phone. We couldn't ignore that. Nor could we ignore the fact that we'd spent more time fooling around than we should have and we needed to hurry. So, it shouldn't have come as a surprise when the light bar of a police cruiser started flashing behind us.

Nicky pulled the bike over, and the cruiser stopped several feet behind us. It was still early enough in the evening that the streets were pretty heavy with traffic, and it seemed like every car that passed by slowed down just a little so they could get a look at us. Of course, they probably were.

I wasn't sure what to do, because I'd never been pulled over on a bike before. Nicky cut the engine and put the kickstand down. He turned his head and glanced back at me. "Put your hands up on my shoulders." I did as he told me and he kept his hands on the handlebars.

The door of the cruiser opened and I heard the officer step out of his car and make his way towards us. He stopped at the left rear corner of the bike and we both had to crane our necks around to look at him.

"I'm officer Tate. Ma'am, I'm going to need you to remove your helmet. Sir, I need to ask you to remove the key from the ignition." He stood with his elbow resting over the top of his gun. He held a flashlight in his other hand, which he kept pointed at us. I removed the helmet as asked and squinted at him through the bright light. "License and registration, please."

Nicky pulled them both from his wallet and handed them over. It was hard to tell through being blinded by the flashlight, but the almost bored expression on the cop's face changed when he looked at the license. "Are you carrying, Mr. Spencer?"

"Yes sir, shoulder holster." Nicky said, and I really hoped that wasn't going to cause a big problem. We needed to get going.

The officer looked me over, probably gauging the likelihood of whether I was carrying too. There was nowhere on me to hide a gun, even with my shirt now untucked. It would have had to have been a very tiny gun, in a very uncomfortable place. I could see he was going to dismiss me as a non-threat when our eyes met and I slipped right into his head without meaning to. He was going to take Nicky's gun and have him take a seat in the cruiser while he ran the gun, our descriptions, Nicky's license, and the bike. It was going to take forever and we didn't have time for this.

"Ma'am?" The office looked a little confused. Dazed, almost. Oops.

I bit my lip. I knew I shouldn't try it. It was stupid. He wasn't some harmless, cute little shoe salesman for me to practice on. If I screwed up, we were screwed.

"We're really in a hurry, officer." I said apologetically. He stared blankly and the hand holding the flashlight wavered a bit. I really hoped that was a good sign. I didn't know how to do this and read his thoughts at the same time. I didn't even know if that was possible. "We're very sorry for speeding, and we'll be more careful. I need to get home, so maybe... you could let us off with a warning this time?"

I held my breath, no matter that I didn't breathe. It was a breath holding kind of moment. Nicky's muscles were tense beneath my hands.

Officer Tate smiled and handed Nicky his license and registration. "I'm going to let you off on a verbal warning this time, but you watch your speed. If you're going to be taking a passenger, you need to get yourself another helmet too." He nodded at us. "Have a good night now."

I rested my forehead against Nicky's back and sighed heavily. He turned around and winked at me. "Thanks Obi Wan."

I snapped my teeth at him.

. . . . .

When we got to the house, Ben's car was in the driveway. I wasn't happy. Nicky's eyes narrowed at the sight of it, but he didn't say anything. He didn't throw an arm across my shoulders or make some other possessive gesture either, unlike some guys would have done. Namely the owner of that car we were glaring at, or at least I was glaring at.

He sighed. "Well, this ought to be interesting."

"Sure, if watching me neuter a werewolf qualifies." I kicked the front tire of the car as we walked past it towards the house. It wasn't very satisfying, but it wasn't in me to do actual damage to someone's property.

A guard opened the front door for us with a curt nod. I didn't recognize him, but with these guys all wearing the same dark suit and sunglasses, it wasn't real easy to tell them apart. I offered him a small smile anyway. The guy was protecting the house I lived in, which more or less meant he was protecting me too. I figured a smile was the least I could offer in thanks.

Ben was waiting right there in the entryway, with Derek lounging by the stairs, presumably keeping an eye on the werewolf to make sure he didn't cause trouble. I went on the attack right away, and cruelly hoped Ben would be able to smell Nicky on my breath and know what I'd been doing.

"What the hell are you doing here?" I didn't realize just how angry I was until I felt my fangs extend and scrape my lower lip. Ben took a small step backwards, but I just advanced on him. "It's bad enough that you're calling my _mom_. Why can't you just leave me alone? You have no right to come here."

"I'm not here for you." He said tersely, but his eyes flicked over my shoulder to where Nicky stood and he clenched his jaw.

"Then why did we both get called in?" I raised my eyebrows as I shouted at him, crossing my arms over my chest. Nicky put a hand on my arm, a gentle warning that I needed to back off and cool down before I really got mad.

Ben clearly didn't like it. His eyes followed Nicky's hand on my arm and darkened. But then he shook himself and looked at me again. "I don't want to fight with you. Not tonight, Eryn."

I stepped away from him and backed up until I ran into Nicky and stopped. He dropped his hand from my arm. Then I really looked at Ben. He didn't look like himself. He looked... exhausted. His hair was unwashed and finger combed, his clothes were wrinkled like he'd slept in them. Or maybe he hadn't slept at all. There were dark circles under his eyes. I looked at Derek, but he just shrugged at me.

"My office, please." Erik stepped into the entryway from behind me and herded us before him, all except for Derek who remained where he was.

Erik's office wasn't empty when we stepped inside. Bhavna stood to the side of Erik's chair behind his desk, and Aris sat on the far end of the sofa positioned across the small room. Nathan was there as well, seated in a stiff wooden chair against another wall. Ben took up position standing beside the sofa, at the opposite end of where Aris sat. Nicky plopped down in the middle, beside Aris. I had no choice but to sit at the other end, closest to Ben.

Nicky ruffled Aris's hair as though she were a little kid and she giggled at him. Great. I didn't know he was a fan.

"What's going on?" Nicky asked her.

She frowned at him before whispering loudly, "You don't get to walk into a movie during the last fifteen minutes and expect to be filled in. You'll just have to wait and see how it ends."

He snatched a licorice whip out of the bucket in her lap and flipped her nose with it before taking a bite. "In other words, you don't know either."

Erik took his seat behind his desk and focused his attention on Ben. "Would you care to update Miss Carter and the others here as to what brought you to our home this evening?"

Ben looked nervous, and he swallowed audibly. His shoulders were tight, and even though he had his hands shoved into his pockets, I could tell he had them clenched into fists. He didn't look aggressive, but neither did he look like he'd be willing to back down from a fight if challenged right then. He looked scared. And that scared me.

"What happened?" I asked him with none of the anger I had when I'd entered the house. I felt my eyes tighten in response to the anxiety radiating from him.

"Jason's dead." He told me. I doubted anyone else in the room would know who that was. Jason had been the only other member of Ben's pack to survive the attack on our house a month earlier, an attack orchestrated by the pack's Alpha, Gabe. Ben had been forced to kill Gabe in my defense.

Jason and I hadn't been close. I'd considered him a friend once, but I felt more guilt at the lack of emotion I felt over hearing he was dead than I felt grief.

"I'm sorry," I said, and then I felt more guilt over the fact that I couldn't come up with something better to say than that. I was confused though. It didn't make sense that Ben would come here because of that.

"He was executed this afternoon, Eryn. Because of what we did here."

"Oh..." I said. I frowned.

Nicky put his hand on my back and addressed Ben. "You're here because you think you're next?" I stiffened and his hand grew heavy on my back, like he was trying to hold me in place.

"I don't think I'm next," Ben shook his head. "I am next. They found me guilty of murdering my Alpha. Next to that, what's trying to instigate a little war? I'm screwed." He laughed, but there was no humor in it.

"But," I leaned towards Ben and clasped my hands in my lap to keep from reaching out towards him. "You didn't murder him. He attacked you, so it was self defense."

He shook his head again. "I murdered him in defense of a vampire. That's all they see."

"I don't understand." I had to blink to keep my eyes from filling with tears. I was getting really tired of crying every time I got the slightest bit upset. "What did Jason do wrong? I mean, in their minds. Why would they care? You're all werewolves. We're vampires. They should be happy you attacked us, right? So even if they're pissed about Gabe, why does the rest matter to them?" I didn't even know who "they" were. Did werewolves have their own private government or something?

"The elders don't care if anybody goes out and kills a vampire or two so long as it's a clean kill, or unless they really had it coming and there's solid evidence that it had to be done. They don't want a full blown war to start over one pack being stupid enough to attack, unprovoked, on that scale. Jason was a reminder that that won't be tolerated. I wasn't involved in the attack. I was here, but I didn't come to fight. I just... I wanted to make sure you were safe." He laughed again, no more humor this time than before. "The real kicker is that if Gabe had lived, they'd be executing him for all of that too."

He ran a hand through his hair before shoving it in his pocket again. "So... I'm boned. No trial, no... I don't even get to defend myself. It's just kill on sight."

Erik cleared his through, bringing our attention back to him.

"Mr. Highcliff has offered us some valuable information in exchange for our assistance. We will be keeping our young friend in one of our safe houses until after the night of the new moon. At that time the greatest danger to Mr. Highcliff will have passed and he should be able to make it safely out of the city. I will require all of you to remain at the safe house with Mr. Highcliff until that time." He turned his attention to Nicky. "Nicky, I'll need you to act as a go between. In case this interferes with business as usual for you, you'll find I've doubled your salary for the next two weeks. You needn't stay in the house, but I'll need you to keep in contact with Aris so I imagine you'll be spending plenty of time there."

This time, it was me that Erik turned to. "I have a check for you as well, Miss Carter." He handed an envelope to Bhavna, who stepped around the desk to hand it over to me. I wasn't sure what I was being paid for though.

"For training... expenses... all that goof stuff." Nathan said, which clued me in on how confused I must have looked.

"Thank you," I said.

Erik nodded. "I'm sending you because of your history with Mr. Highcliff. This will no doubt be easier for him with a familiar face around. Nathan, you will go because Miss Carter isn't ready to go off on her own yet. If you're able to do so, by all means... continue her training while at the safe house. Otherwise a few days will make little difference, but either way you will supervise her.

"You coming with us, Bhav?" Nathan asked.

"No," Erik answered for her. "I cannot spare Bhavna." He sighed. "Aris, is there a problem?"

I glanced over at her, and my eyes widened. She was glaring daggers at Erik and shaking her foot so hard I was surprised I hadn't noticed the sofa vibrating along with it.

"None at all," she said with a vicious smile. "Because I'm not going anywhere."

Bhavna said something in a language I wasn't familiar with. Indian, I assumed. Whatever it was, it wasn't nice and Aris flinched in response. The foot shook harder.

"I am not," she mumbled. I really wished I knew what Bhavna had called her. "But it's not my job to protect some animal, either. I made a promise to protect _you_." She stabbed a finger towards Erik. "I can't do that hiding in some shack across town, babysitting _him_ and your get."

Erik pressed his hands together, forming a steeple with his fingers. His eyes looked angry, but they didn't match the rest of him, which was all cool and calm. He didn't speak until they no longer flashed.

"No daddy." Aris said as soon as Erik opened his mouth, but she said it in a whining, childish voice.

"Daughter," Erik said with a smile. I'd never heard him refer to Aris that way, and apparently it wasn't a common thing for him to do so, because Aris crinkled her forehead at him and suddenly looked very wary. "You will obey your father."

"I'm not," Aris started, but Erik stopped her with a sharp gesture of his hand.

"You don't get to change the rules you have yourself set when they are no longer convenient to you. You will obey me."

Aris jerked her chin upwards and if she held on to that bucket of licorice any tighter, she was going to crush it. "Very well," she said, "but if any harm comes to you while I'm pet sitting, I'll be making myself a pot of mongrel stew."

"Umm..." I winced when everyone turned to look at me. "I'm probably going to be smacked down for saying this, but... maybe she's right? I'm assuming you chose Aris because she's the badass among us, but what's the point of setting someone up as a bodyguard if they really don't give a rat's ass about what happens to that... body. Besides, Aris is a..." I hesitated over what I wanted to call the girl, and then felt the pressure at the base of my skull build when I didn't finish my sentence. I threw up a wall. I don't know how I did it, but the pressure cut off immediately. I glared at Nathan, whose satisfied smile was enough to prove he'd been the one trying to poke into my head; probably trying to force me to spit out the word I'd been about to say. I decided to say it anyway. In less colorful language. "She's insane."

Aris giggled.

"You don't trust her?" Erik asked me.

"No," I said, uncomfortable.

"Do you trust me?"

"Of course." I felt like I was going to throw up, no matter that Erik didn't look mad at me or anything, but I really needed to learn to keep my mouth shut.

"Then trust that I know Aris will do what she must, and that she is the best defense Mr. Highcliff will have against what he may face."

"And also, Aris is not insane." Aris smiled sweetly at me.

Erik chuckled. "I'm not qualified to make that assessment, but perhaps it would be wise to remember that just because Aris wears a human body... she is not human. We cannot expect her to think the same way we do. That is not necessarily a bad thing. Now..." He stood up and gestured toward the door. "There is an audience waiting in the ballroom, and Mr. Highcliff has agreed to share some very interesting information with us. Let's not keep them waiting any longer."


End file.
